Okay, I'm detangling myself from flickr now to pop in here and jot down a few thought from the day - and what a lovely day it has been! The weather was perfect and my mood was amazingly good but even better I spent nearly the entire day with my kids! So many days go by when I don't take the time to pro-actively train them, play with them and just generally enjoy being with them. They are great kids and truly a joy to raise but in the day-to-day I miss so much.
Today we tossed balls, I listened to Beth read a book all by herself and was amazed as she said "I need to read another page because that one was so short" and we brought a blanket outside and I started reading "eat pray love" which was not at all what I expected but I'm looking forward to reading more of tonight. After dinner I washed dishes while the girls played outside some more. They yelled and ran and climbed on trees, they fed sticks to the dog and Katie-Abigail only bonked Emma on the head with a stick once! I bathed them before bed and brewed some Starbucks coffee.
I didn't get the bathroom clean like I'd hoped (though I did wash the towels in this lovely new scented detergent I bought!) and I didn't even get started sorting out the girls room like I'd planned, but I think I chose the right thing to do today. This afternoon I kept thinking "what has happened to this day? why haven't I done more?" then I realized that I had been too busy toting my babies around and it just puts a smile on my face to realize that today I was present. Today I looked my children in the eye and told them "I love you" and I listened and I laughed. Today I felt alive. Not half asleep, overwhelmed, trying to escape the pain. Those painful thoughts did creep up but as soon as they did I set them aside. "I will not allow this to define who I am." I'd think to myself. "I will not allow this to consume me." and I put on praise music by Paul Baloche, Matt Papa and Tim Hughes and I turned it up loud!
About "eat pray love" it is a "spiritual" book but not a Christian book. In the beginning pages she thanks her Guru! I have certainly never read anything like this before! But it's an easy and enjoyable read and I look forward to hearing her observations about live and spirituality, so now I'm going to snuggle down on the couch and read while I wait for Daniel to come home from work.